Sojourn with the Smiths

Stronger

2011-08-02T23:17:00.000-07:00

We had some friends over, and they took the blankets off Eve's bed and slid around the house on them pretending to be a train. They are tooo cute.
Eve and Nicholas scooted our laundry basket all over the house--they were pretending to go on a road trip and then they would rock it until it tipped over and they fell on top of each other. Then they'd go to the hospital. I hope this isn't foreshadowing our upcoming road trip!
Nicholas really wanted to wake Eve up the other morning. No, her sheets and blankets don't match. Yes, we're stylish.
The other day I was walking around without my glasses on (I'm SUPER blind) and saw something large-ish skitter from under my feet. I screamed and put on my glasses and found this cute guy! We chased him around the room, and then decided to let him stay in the house. Geckos eat bugs, and I hate bugs. (but the next day I found a GIANT cockroach in our [clean] living room, and I was like "WHERE is my gecko?!!" But I'm pretty sure the cockroach could've eaten it.)
I left paint unattended--Nicholas was clean compared to the floor in Eve's room! He was so proud of himself, and really it was too funny to be mad about (and luckily it was washable paint)!

I just realized that almost all the pictures are of the kids in PJs or half-naked. Yes, I do put real clothes on them. Sometimes.

Now an update on Nicholas and Natty:

We've asked their father to pick them up at the end of August. I sat outside our house in the car when I called. Then I walked into my empty house and sobbed and sobbed and screamed.

We're asking him to meet us in TX--I'm taking all the kids out to San Antonio at the end of the month for Jardan's graduation from basic training (yes, 3 kids in the car for 15 hours. I'm going to take 2 days AND rent a car because HEAVEN knows our trusty '96 tercel may not live to see TX). Hopefully he'll meet us out there so that we can all be together. I'm so worried for the kids that some nights I can't sleep. But, I know that the Lord is near them, and that He will watch over them:

Doctrine and Covenants 50:41, 44
Fear not, little children, for you are mine...Wherefore, I am in your midst, and I am the good shepherd.

Every day I feel stronger, more at peace, and more calm. Constantly running through my head are the words to Lead, Kindly Light (I've always loved that song): "Keep thou my feet, I do not ask to see the distance scene, one step enough for me."

Thanks for your love, faith, and support! It's such a comfort to know that we're not doing this alone.

Choosing to Breathe

2011-07-25T02:54:00.001-07:00

We went hiking at Tonto Natural Bridge with some of our friends! So beautiful; go if you ever get the chance!

When Nicholas wakes up from his nap, Eve LOVES to climb into his crib so they can play together. Then they beg to play with Natty, too :)

A couple years ago I had out-patient surgery. I was getting my tubes tied because it was too dangerous to have more kids: after I had Eve I was diagnosed with peripartum cardiomyopathy, a random and rare heart condition related to pregnancy. Anyway, when I was in the recovery area after surgery, I was waking up, but was so tired that I kept forgetting to breathe. It actually felt good to NOT breathe, it was like taking a break. This was all really hazy, but I remember I would stop breathing (it just felt SO GOOD), and so some monitor would start beeping and the nurses would yell over to me, "Aubrey! You've got to breathe!" I was so annoyed, but I complied and would breathe again for a minute, and then stop once more. I've since heard that this can be an after-effect of anesthesia.

I feel like that right now.

On the 12th of July (the day before my birthday, that's the only reason I remember the date), Nicholas and Natalia's mother called me. I'd sent her the consent to adopt papers for Natalia--she'd told me we could adopt Natalia but not Nicholas. We were devastated, but we figured if we had Natty, eventually we'd probably get Nicholas. She got the papers, and called to tell me that she'd changed her mind, and that we can't adopt either one. SOO much more happened, but really I don't have the time to write it all out. So, I sent her a letter last week asking her to reconsider. I asked her to think about the goals she has for the kids, and whether she could provide those things for them. I got a call today from her, but it really wasn't a discussion. She mostly just yelled. Lucky for me, the collect call minutes I'd prepaid for ran out, and I didn't accept any more of her calls (I don't need that treatment, I don't want to yell at her, and all the rational things I could say will never change her mind).

I don't know how to explain my situation very well. Some people question whether I'm their parent. If you wonder this, I can answer, I just don't have the desire to post it ALL here :) Let me know and I'll tell you. Regardless, I am their mother, albeit only ONE of their mothers. And I'm losing two of my children.

And I find it hard to breathe.

When I'm alone and I start thinking about losing them (usually I push it out of mind), I'm so tired and so sad that I sometimes take a break and stop breathing. I remember how good it felt before, and for minute it feels good again. Just to stop. Then, like the nurses, I yell to myself, "Aubrey! You have to breathe!" Then, I decide to breathe again.

I've learned that this is like my faith. I've always heard about "the trial of your faith." This is mine, I guess. To be led here, and then have the kids taken back. And like when I decide to breathe, I've learned that I have to DECIDE to have faith in God. It's not just going to BE there, I have to actually choose to have it. I know there is an alternative, and sometimes it is tempting to just throw my hands up and be done with it all. Resign myself to the idea that there is no God, or that He does not watch over me and my little family. I see this alternative, and I realize that it's my choice. I could choose either one, and I choose faith. I choose to believe that God watches over us, although people have the freedom to make their own choices. I choose to believe He loves me and my children, and that He will guide me. And that Jardan and I may lose Natalia and Nicholas, but that does NOT mean that He is not there. In my sadness, I have chosen to breathe, and I have chosen faith.

Bragging

2011-07-08T23:14:00.001-07:00

I just want to put it "out there" that I weedwacked today (this was a 2-day affair). I'm admittedly afraid of any type of power tools, and, yes, I count my weed wacker as a power tool. The kids wanted to swim in our inflatable giraffe kiddy pool, but I was afraid that the forest of weeds lining our cement patio (I NEVER let the kids step off of it, mind you) was harboring any number of creepy creatures. Living in Arizona, I visualized rattle-snakes, scorpions, and cockroaches emerging en masse to assault my darling children. This wasn't absurd, seeing as the weeds went up to...well, my knees in some places. We also have a bottomless pit by part of our patio, and THERE the weeds go up to mid-thigh. Scary? Yes.

So, yesterday I took the weed wacker to the back yard and then tried to find our extension cord. My DARLING husband was so sweet and stayed up late (well, early...) to pack up as much as possible before he left so that I wouldn't be overwhelmed when the kids and I move. He is AMAZING. However, I could NOT find the extension cord, and searched for about an hour (it ended up in one of the 20 tupperware storage bins in our garage). I pulled on some jeans and tennis shoes (seriously, this was a labor of love for my kids, it was like 115 degrees outside) and went outside to plug in the ominous-looking power tool. I held it as far away from me as I could, braced myself, and started it up. It roared to life, but all the weeds were unharmed because, apparently, there was no line in it. About 4 hours later (comprised of watching videos on youtube, attempting it myself, then calling my dad for help and packing up the kids so HE could re-string it, but the stubborn machine still wouldn't work with us), I had a fully-functioning weed wacker. And a dark backyard.

I woke up today with a killer sinus infection and a fever...so we lounged around and eventually the kids begged me to let them play in the pool. So I showered first (why?!), threw on my jeans and tennis shoes again, and ushered my children outside. I was REALLY scared to do it, but found that I actually liked wielding all the power! Ha! Thank heavens no snakes, cockroaches, or scorpions were found (I did have heavy-duty bug-killing spray on hand, though, in case it came down to me vs. scorpion)! I swept, blew-up our dusty pool (yum. Remnants of our recent dust-storm--it was super creepy), scrubbed it, patched it with duct-tape (I know! But it was the only thing I had on-hand), and filled it up. Eve and Nicholas HOWLED with delight, and raced to get their swimsuits.

The kids were so cute playing out there. I sat inside and watched from the couch as I fed Natty. They splashed, fought, shared, screached, and laughed...I loved it. After dinner I went out to get the extension cord, and sadly found that our pool was leaking! All that work, for about 40 minutes of play time! It was worth it, though. Maybe it's silly, but I felt so capable and strong, and I loved sweating and working so my kids could play. And now when I write my daily letter to Jardan, I can brag about using a power-tool.

All Is Well

2011-06-15T00:54:00.000-07:00

(A few pictures from our trip to Tonto Natural Bridge, one of my favorite places in AZ)

When I was in school, I kept saying to myself that everything will be easier once I'm out. That we'll be able to rest a bit, take a little breather. . . ha! At least I haven't fallen into the "so-lazy-I-can't-get-out-of-bed" trap. Although I have, unfortunately, fallen into the "so-busy-I-don't-have-time-to-shower" trap. Nice.

Sometimes it seems like every step we take toward adoption is suddenly cut off by a gigantic brick wall. We think we can move forward, but then BAM! Brick wall. For instance, we were able to add Nicholas and Natalia onto our military benefits, as long as we can turn in their social security cards. No problem, I think, because we have a notarized document saying we can get the cards from the government. Previously, we were told by military human resources that we'd have to have a court order saying that the 2 kids are our legal dependents, but then when we went back in around 2-3 weeks later, they said it wasn't necessary. I almost EXPLODED with happiness. So. . . I called the national number for social security info, and they said that the docs we have will work just fine. I gather all the kids' birth certificates (difficult to get) and vaccine info, and went in a few days later, only to be told (BAM! Insert brick wall) that we have to have a court order to get their cards, and that notarized documents are not accepted. Along with this, we're facing other significant obstacles to getting cards (they just keep popping up), so we really don't know how to remedy the situation.

At nearly every step something similar has happened. I am exhausted physically (2 crying kids in the social security office while trying to speak to a supervisor and argue my point?!) and emotionally. The amazing part? Every time I'm tempted to SCREAM and THROW SOMETHING across the room, a beautiful peace settles on me. Every time I think that I am just incapable of taking one more step, I'm given strength.

Two Sundays ago there was a beautiful lesson in church where we talked about the Brother of Jared in the Book of Mormon (http://lds.org/scriptures/bofm/ether/3?lang=eng). It was inspiring to see how he faced so many obstacles, but persisted. That his faith remained strong as he continued to ask the Lord to guide him. How, when he faced situations that, according to our understanding, should be impossible to overcome, the Lord made a way. I know that the Lord will light our way, as He did for the brother of Jared, and that He has mercifully lit our way at each step.

I spoke to Nicholas and Natalia's mother and father today for the first time. It went better than I had thought it would, but not as well as I had hoped. We're meeting with their mother this weekend. Surprisingly, I feel (yet again) peace and reassurance. I don't know that we'll keep the kids, but I know that this, right now, is what we should be doing. And I LOVE fighting for them. Even if that means taking 3 kids--2 screaming--to the social security office, or spending entire days (yes, I'm not exaggerating) on the phone trying to figure things out. This trial is one that's easy for me to find joy in, because, while the kids are screaming, I'm also at that moment LOVING having to wrangle them! I love everything about them, even their screams, and especially their laughter and crazy antics.

Here's something that keeps me going.
"Why should we mourn, or think our lot is hard? Tis not so, all is right. Why should we think to earn a great reward if we now shun the fight? Gird up your loins, fresh courage take, our God will never us forsake."

Laughing Baby

2011-06-05T01:04:00.000-07:00

I have so much to write, but I'm toooo tired so I'm posting this DARLING picture of Natty smiling. She has the funniest laugh--she's been laughing the last few weeks. It's all raspy and hoarse and she always looks like she can't decide whether to laugh or cry. It's hilarious and beautiful. We all spend most of our days trying to make her laugh. (Sorry I can't figure out why this is so tiny!)

Love

2011-05-19T23:30:00.000-07:00

Nicholas and Natty
My parents, me, and my Master's project at my defense! I think I'm in shock.
Nicholas and Eve decorating Nana's Mother's Day present
Eve hard at work setting up croquet
They love to roar together.
Me, my paper, and my AMAZING (and oh-so-patient) adviser!
Playing in the backyard

Eve and Natty fell asleep like this on our bed.
(Sorry the pictures were in such a strange order)

We realized two days ago, after talking to scores of attorneys, praying, and pondering, that if Nicholas and Natty's (birth)mother wants them back when she's released from prison, then back they'll go. It was a heartbreaking day. It's so very scary to have so much depend upon one person--especially whom we've never met. We're planning to visit her soon.

I'm having a difficult time deciding whether to bring Nicholas--I think it'll scare him. He gets nervous on long car rides (because he's been passed around so much), and seeing her might be scary/confusing.

It's been hard thinking about her. I constantly alternate between ugly vindictive feelings ("She's doesn't deserve them!") and trying to remember that she's their mother--although I am, too--and that she's also a daughter of God and my sister. My friend recently discussed the parable of the Prodigal Son on her blog, and it really stuck with me. Especially how we've all been lost at some point (Pres. Hinckley: "...for are we not all prodigal sons and daughters who need to repent and partake of the forgiving mercy of our Heavenly Father and then follow His example?"). Love, mercy, and respect are ESSENTIAL in our dealings with other people. Whether we keep these darling children, or return them to her, in both cases the only way to have peace and happiness is through loving and respecting her. So, this will be a great learning experience for me.

On a happier note, I defended my master's project and PASSED! It was wonderful. It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life! I know that sounds weird (it's school, after all), but I LOVE my project, I LOVE the women I worked with, I LOVE what I found--and the implications of it, and I LOVE the things I learned. To share that was beautiful. Jardan, my dad, and my mom were all there with me, and knowing that they love me and that they love my work was amazing. It was beautiful. Now I just need to settle down, de-stress, and ENJOY. Even though I struggle some days being a mother of three and balancing it all (surprise! My house wasn't messy just because I was in school....it's me. I'm messy. Ha!), I feel like every single day is a miracle. It's miraculous to see my kids laughing with each other, building forts, giving each other hugs and, when one gets hurt, the other one quickly going to their side and asking if they're ok. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. I am so in love with my life, and so in love with my family.

From 1 to 3

2011-04-02T14:11:00.000-07:00

It's our one week anniversary! How blessed we are!

I took all three kids out for the first time yesterday. The car seats are so squished together that we can't undo the seat belt for Eve's booster seat, so she has to slip under the already-buckled belt!

As we drove to the outdoor mall to play in the water fountain, I was trying to figure out how I'd get all three out of the car and to the fountain. I got a bit panicky when I pulled in the parking space (can I really do this?!). I got Eve out first, because she sticks with me. Then I strapped the baby carrier on and buckled Natty into it. Draped the diaper bag over my shoulder, handed the towels to Eve (who got bigger overnight--last Friday she looked like a baby to me, and by Saturday she was HUGE!), shut the door, went to the other side and got out Nickolas. (Or is it Nicholas? I can't tell because it's spelled different on different documents!). I have to hold his hand TIGHT because he's so excited ALL the time and loves to run. We were quite a sight. I loved being surrounded by kids, so many that I couldn't even hold all their hands and had to strap one to me! My cup overflows. It was beautiful.

Hmm

2010-10-12T19:49:00.000-07:00

Texting while I try to work on my paper on campus:

Me:
i'm just having a difficult time moving forward. i think ive got a clog in my brain today. ech.

Jardan:
after all of the clogging maybe there will be an eruption of great idea... thats usually how it happens so stick to it

Me:
that sounds really disgusting.

I sure do love my husband and his gross motivational funniness. I guess I'll stay the course.

Mothers

2010-10-05T21:15:00.000-07:00

I've been working and thinking about mothers a LOT lately, especially single mothers. For my thesis work I've done interviews with single mothers who are welfare recipients, and I recently finished analyzing the transcripts (moving on to writing the thesis!). I think about them constantly, and ache to use my education to benefit them.

I feel so blessed to have this time to learn from the women that I've interviewed. I can't help but think that I could have been any of them, if I was born into a different family. I just finished analyzing an interview for a woman named Mary (not actually her name, she picked it as a pseudonym). She is amazing. She is strong and courageous and a MOTHER. She has 6 children, and is 40.

She grew up with a stepfather who was an abusive alcoholic. He wouldn't let her mother work, so he sent her and her siblings to work in the fields. After school she'd go to the fields and pick onions with her younger brothers and sisters, and then they'd sleep in the fields. They'd wake up in the morning, go to a little house her parents shared with her uncles (yes, her PARENTS lived in a house!), shower off, and go to school smelling like onions.

Her mom eventually left her dad, and they moved to the southwest and at 15 she started working in a meat packing plant to take care of her 4 younger brothers and sisters. She went to school until 10th grade, and had several abusive boyfriends and husbands. She always provided for her family, though, and worked difficult, long hours. She kept them off the streets and always made sure they had enough to eat. When she had her last 2 children, she decided to go back to get her GRE. She was working 2 jobs, and was also taking care of 6 kids, breastfeeding, and attending night classes for her GRE.

One of her daughters has 2 kids, but her boyfriends is a drug addict and has been in jail. She told her daughter she needs to leave him and get a job, and take care of her kids: " I said I went to work. I had 2 f--- jobs. I went to school, and still you had a roof over your head. I didn’t get assistance, I didn’t have help from nobody. From nobody. I did it by myself. You know, why can’t you f--- do it by yourself now? You know. And the ones that are watching us are your kids. Like you watched every single thing that I did. I said, tell me when we lived in shelters. Tell me when we were sleeping in cars. Tell me when we were without a home. You tell me when. Never. I said, you know why? Because if I had to sell my ass to give you a f--- gallon of milk, I would! Because that’s how much pride I had for myself. Ok, your dad didn’t wanna be there? He knew you were there, but he wanted to be running around doing drugs, doing this, you know, I don’t need the bullshit. It’s hard. He wasn’t getting up a 4, 5 in the morning when you had diarrhea, when you had a fever and I had to take you the doctors for your allergies. He wasn’t there. He wasn’t there when you got up and walked, you know?"

She didn't use ANY government assistance until 2 years ago, when her back problems made it so she couldn't work.

My heart is so full when I think of her. She is so level-headed and fair. She seems so hardened & her language is course, but it was also strong & confident. She loves her children with a fiery, firm, unquestioning passion.

I've also been thinking about single mothers because we're almost done with all the adoption paperwork, and are about to do our homestudy (which is a huge step, the ppwk has been HARD). We've already had incredible answers to our prayers and miracles. I feel so blessed to be a part of adoption. It doesn't feel like a trial to be adopting, it really feels like a blessing, instead! I can't stop thinking about it, about what to put for our answers on the paperwork, about these mothers making such difficult decisions, and praying for them, and thinking about the children, and praying for the children. I am so excited to increase our family, not only by one baby, but by that beautiful woman, our birth mother.

More new pictures and our lovely pet

2010-06-05T01:05:00.000-07:00

It's watermelon season! Eve has been BEGGING me to buy a watermelon, and when i bought it she wanted to draw a face and then eat watermelon man's brains. I don't know where this morbid child gets these ideas...

We have a yearly tradition of waking Eve up in the middle of the night and going to IHOP. This is the best pic yet.
We got her some pancakes, and at IHOP they've got a zillion different syrup flavors. We asked Eve which she wanted and poured a few on for her, but she just looks at me and says, "I don't like these. I want the different one." She meant ketchup. Yes. So I gave some to her, thinking she'd try a bite and go for syrup instead, but I was wrong. She scarfed down the pancakes and ketchup with a BIG smile on her face. Jardan was disgusted: Jardan will eat anything other than ketchup, pickles, and mayo. ANYTHING--congealed lamb's blood, duck neck, rattlesnake and rabbit sausages, or even gulp down the traditional Filipino food of raw, half-formed chicks inside an egg...but not ketchup. It's nice to be able to gross him out once in a while!

And SURPRISE! We got a new pet. I tie it to a leash and take it for walks, and sleep with it right next to me on my pillow, and pet it, and kiss it, and love it. Who needs puppies or kitties or sweet little bunnies? I've got a nice big flying cockroach. It's like a bat, but cooler.

So, my friend and i were having a girl's night at my place, and she went to go to the bathroom. I'm in the kitchen, and I hear from down the hall, "Uhhh Aubrey! Something just scurried out of your bathroom and escaped." My heart starts pounding and I get a little queasy as I look to the floor. "Go put some shoes on, Aubrey!" I see it in the corner of the hallway, poised, ready to either strike or make a break for my room (p.s. we don't have a bed, we sleep on the floor on some blankets and a memory foam mattress topper....and our "bed" is right by the door to our room)...so like a ninja I leap into my room, fumble for the light chain hanging from my fan (it's late and dark, so it felt like it took an eternity to turn it on), and throw on my running shoes. I get into pouncing position, and wonder how I can smash it as it stares me down from it's strategic position in the corner. I go for it, but can't quite get it, and it sprints for our room. I let out a war-cry death scream (or a scream of terror??), and throw ALL my weight into three mighty stomps. I step back, adrenaline still coursing through me, and admire my handiwork. I feel like I just won a fight with Jason Bourne. Ha!! Of course I took pictures, so Jardan couldn't say that I exaggerated the size. It was huge. Almost as big as my deodorant.

Hooray

2010-03-20T13:44:00.000-07:00

We got a recycling bin! (We've been lusting after recycling bins ever since we got married, and our landlord out of the blue gave us one yesterday! Dorky, but I'm so excited!) And I figured out how to use a HORRENDOUS policy manual on our state's website, so I've gotten a TON of info on Nutrition Assistance (food stamps) and Cash Assistance and am ready to start writing a paper for my class. Sooo happy! And my friend is applying for help from DES, and called me and I was able to USE my research and HELP HER! I felt so fulfilled.

Thankful (for scared, dumb crooks.)

2010-03-18T14:05:00.000-07:00

So someone broke into our apartment today. Weird part: I'm pretty sure they had a key. And no one that we know who has a key went in this morning (we do, the landlord, and the guy who does maintenance who's our friend). I came back from doing interviews for my project, and when i went to unlock the deadbolt, it was already unlocked. Which was weird, because I KNEW i locked it. We don't live in the best neighborhood, and there's also been some people camping out in the alleyway by our house. I also KNEW i had locked the back door, because after I locked the front door when I left, I walked around back just to make sure it was locked. So because the deadbolt was unlocked, as soon as I got in I ran into the kitchen to make sure that door was locked, but both the locks on that door were unlocked! So I ran outside and called Jardan, the landlord, and our friend who does maintenance to see if any of them had been inside, but they hadn't. (Didn't actually talk to maintenance, but his wife said he'd been gone allll morning.) Called the police, when they came they looked through everything, but no windows were broken and nothing was missing.

Not like we have much to steal. We do have a TV, but it was free and crappy and makes this loud buzzing noise, and when I saw it was still there I was almost sad. Haha! Other than that, my computer was out, and it was there still, too. Not sure what's up with this whole thing--maybe they got spooked?? I came home earlier than I was supposed to, so maybe they saw me pull up and left. I got done with interviews early, and was gonna go get Eve from preschool and hang out in her class for a while, but I had this strong feeling to go home, even though I'd only be there for, like, 5 minutes. So i went, even though i didn't know why I was going home at all.

We got robbed a few years ago, too. (Is robbed the right word??) We were out of town, and got back and our place was TRASHED. The best part: they were super dumb. Jardan had randomly decided to hide the computer, which we never did even though we'd been out of town a zillion times and left it out in the open, so they didn't get my computer. (Holy Ghost, thank you). But they did steal: 2 guitars--1 was broken, DVDs we'd bought in China that were prob. copies in the first place and half only played in Chinese, a broken clock, scriptures (haha!!), a broken computer, etc, etc. DUMB. I had my social security card and some credit cards out on the counter that they didn't take. Pretty sure they made off with the crappiest load of stolen stuff that anyone's ever stolen. Doubt they got more than $20 worth of stuff. We, on the other hand, got enough money from insurance to buy a new computer to replace the broken one they stole! Haha. I'm pretty sure we made money, and someone took our trash out for us. Thank you dumb crooks.

I'll post later with some pictures of the last little while.

Blessings!

2010-01-12T20:49:00.000-08:00

Ok, the pictures are all backwards, but I'm too computer-illiterate to do anything about it (and too lazy. I'm reading a good Orson Scott Card book that I want to get back to before I go to sleep--Pastwatch: The Redemption of Christopher Colombus).

Well, it's been a while! (I think I always say that). We don't have too many pictures of Christmas & Thanksgiving because a lot of them were taken with Mom and Dad's beautiful camera that has more than twice the megapixels of ours :) Hopefully I will get them on here at some point. The Eisenbrandts came to visit for Thanksgiving, and it was so fun! Then Christmas came around, and it was beautiful. Eve loved FHEs in December because we played with the manger set, but she was confused about Santa ("Heavenly Father lives with Santa"...hmm...). Christmas Eve we all went around the neighborhood looking at the luminaries--everyone in my parent's neighborhood has them up, so they line the streets and look beautiful. And it was even chilly enough to wear a jacket!

For our anniversary (FOUR YEARS on Jan 4), Jardan and I went to Flagstaff to go snowboarding. I was actually really nervous, I'd heard all sorts of horror stories (I was really scared my glasses would fall off, hence the hat that keeps them on), but Jardan is an amazing and ever-patient teacher and I graduated from bunnyhills to a real slope (albeit beginners). Jardan got a few black-diamond (that's what they're called, right) runs in. He used to snowboard allll the time in high school--I've even seen pictures of him snowboarding in nothing but shorts. Talk about hard-core. I was so tired after that my legs wouldn't stop shaking, but it was GREAT and so fun to do something totally new and challenging. I've never done anything like it! We stayed for two nights in Flagstaff, and it was so nice to be out in colder weather!! Thank you Mom and Dad for watching Eve!!!!!

Also, we're moving out into our own place!!!!! !!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! For those of you who don't know, Jardan got a JOB in November (unemployed since the end of Feb '09) at a local hospital, doing much the same thing he had been doing before. We are so grateful and humbled, and feel so blessed to have this opportunity. We know it was the Lord who made it possible to find a job in Phoenix, and are so grateful (beyond adequate words) for the charity of my parents in letting us stay with them. They are a beautiful example to me of sacrificing their home (their CLEAN and PEACEFUL home), and truly making us feel welcome and comfortable here. What a blessing it has been to live with them as an adult, because I have such a different perspective and have learned so much...and to live with my little brother again, who has the greatest sense of humor (and most disturbing??). The last 11 months have gone by so fast, and through this time the thing that stands out above all else (even unemployment) are the incredible blessings and the way the Lord carefully watches and gently cares for us, often through the love and charity of others. Who knew I could feel SO BLESSED?!!?! The Lord has given us so many blessings that I feel they are "pressed down, and shaken together, and running over" (Luke 6:38).

Rock Climbing!

2009-11-14T09:19:00.000-08:00

We love rock climbing! We go with my cousin Ryan sometimes up to Camelback and climb the Monk, and it's awesome. It's kindof a scary climb, though, because you have to climb a little area to get UP to the rock that you climb, so when you're climbing up the Monk it feels like you're 200 feet up instead of just 100 because it's already on top of the mountain.

This is my nervous smile. Climbing and I have a love-hate relationship because I'm so afraid of heights :) I got 3/4 of the way up, and i heard some squeaking and all of a sudden TONS of bats flew out from a crack that was like 1 1/2 feet away from me. I'm not scared of bats, but i was so high up and nervous anyway that i kinda freaked out!

I think Camelback is the prettiest place in Phoenix. Love this view!
Jardan's lead climbing. He climbs up the rock to attach the rope to the top for the rest of us. There's hooks along the way that he hooks the rope into, but if he falls he'd fall like 15 feet before one of them would catch him. He's never fallen, though, but I hate watching this part!
Ryan working the ropes. He never smiles in pictures, so I was SUPER happy to get this one.

Hooray! Can't wait for all my siblings to come out so we can all go together!!

Birthday and Halloween!!

2009-11-03T18:13:00.000-08:00

This year Eve was LION for Halloween. She thoroughly enjoyed roaring at people and scaring Nana. And...I made her costume!! I couldn't have done it without Mom, who patiently guided me during the week-long process. I am ridiculously proud of myself. It turned out super cute, and fit her very well. Anja gave her this "spider bucket" for her birthday, which was fantastic and SO cute! Eve loves it.
The lion and the cowboy. Love the mustache.
This was on Eve's birthday. THREE!
We did a birthday party for her this year with a bunch of her friends! It was SO fun! We put together a treasure hunt (see above treasure chest, compliments of Dad), and at the end we had Zane hide in the trailer with the treasure, so when they opened the door to get the chest he screamed and jumped out. Unfortunately, he knocked Eve on the head as he jumped/screamed, so she started bawling, which produced a chain reaction and ended with a gaggle of sobbing kids. Too funny, but kindof sad.
Zane in Eve's new princess get-up.
Eve in her princess get-up. With a super-sweet dog that walks and barks! (in our defense, she was NOT a "birthday princess," she thinks a princess is a magical person, like a witch, but good. She doesn't think a princess is a "look at me, I'm the most important person in the world" type of person.)
We had the kids decorate giant cupcakes, but I think they liked the sprinkles more than the cake. We caught Eve and her friend eating handfulls of sprinkles and drinking them right out of the bottle. But it was funny, and it was her birthday, so we didn't say anything.

Happy third birthday, Evie! (or is that spelled Evey? I don't know. But she calls herself Eve-ee).

Mom <3s Snakes

2009-10-18T14:35:00.000-07:00

So Jardan, Eve, and I went on a walk a little bit ago, and on the side of the path I spied a snake! Thankfully it was dead. Jardan, being Jardan, picked it up...it had just barely died because rigamortous hadn't set in and nothing crawly was on it. We looked at each other and knew what had to be done--seeing as my mom's FAVORITE things are snakes (she once found one in her yard and called EVERY family member to tell them). Jardan, with a mischeivious sparkle in his eye, carried it all the way home. We thought of SO many things to do with it--some more evil than others. In the end, we settled for the nicest thing we could think of because we ARE living at their house, and we don't want to be kicked out to the curb (this was an ACTUAL fear). Dad also told me that if mom has an anuerism, I'd have to change the diapers. Mom was on her way home from a trip to UT and got in around midnight. We had put the snake in front of the door, and--thank you rigamortous--its head was UP and it looked like it was watching you. It was seriously difficult to walk past it while setting up. We were nice and kept the porch light on, although we were (among other plans) going to turn it off and then flip it on when she was next to it...but our better judgement got the best of us. Above is the after-prank picture with Mom warily looking at it through the screen. She wouldn't get closer.

Just wait a minute for the video, you can't see much but you can hear her yelp and see her run (and hear her yell at me when she sees me standing there...with Jardan chuckling in the background the whole time).

Lesson Learned

2009-09-16T12:41:00.001-07:00

My family and I decided to play Boggle on Sunday night. We haven't played it in a LONG time, but it used to be a family favorite. While looking for the directions, I saw a bunch of old, yellowing word lists, and I picked up this one, written by my mom. Can you find the word that doesn't belong? .......that's right: snook. I presented my finding to mom (who didn't even attempt to deny it was hers--totally her hand writing), and we ganged up on her: What does snook mean? We assaulted her with possibilities, while she ripped this out of my hand and tried to throw it away (I saved it, but got a big wedgie in the process) "Hey Mom! I thought I heard someone snooking around outside!" or: "My mind snooked away from me!" or perhaps "Would you take a snook at that?!" After some good laughs, I decided to look it up, just in case it really IS a word. Unfortunately, I found this:

1. Any of several chiefly marine percoid fishes of the family Centropomidae, especially Centropomus undecimalis, a food and game fish of warm Atlantic waters. Also called sergeant fish.

2. A gesture of defiance, disrespect, or derision.

I guess I shouldn't snook my mom.

Lately!

2009-09-01T10:13:00.000-07:00

Some pictures: My first day of school and Zane being a funny uncle.

Lately...not too much has been going on! Jardan's looking for work still and I started school last week. My classes are going to be pretty easy--I'm even taking a PhD class, but it will be enjoyable and lacking in busy-work. I'm also taking a Social Work class on public policy (Mom thinks I'm CRAZY for loving it...well, maybe I am!) with a professor who I Adore (note the capital A)!

Also, for my Master's thesis (what I'm doing is actually called an Applied Project) I had to go to DES to get permission to interview DES employees and TANF recipients. I had a meeting last week with a DES Assistant Director and a lawyer from the Attorney General's office, and I nearly threw up I was so nervous. But they were both INCREDIBLY nice and very helpful, and I got permission as well as a bunch of information they had gathered for me. I had been praying for literally weeks that I would get permission, because without it I couldn't go on with my study! So, my planning is finally going to become a reality, and I hope I can find ways to help.

What I'm doing is researching the alignment of welfare policies and services with the needs of recipients. I found out a little while ago that, according to federal regulations, only 30% of the people using TANF (aka cash assistance) are ALLOWED to go to college, and of those who are ALLOWED to attend college, they can only go for a year. This is CRAZY to me because if we want to help people out of poverty, we have to at least PERMIT them to get more education! I'm not even talking about paying for education; I see a real need to change the regulations to allow them to go to SCHOOL! Any thoughts/questions? My plan: do research, and then figure out how to change this.

Thoughts on the Fall

2009-08-05T07:56:00.000-07:00

Jardan and I were reading scriptures, and I've always been confused (to say the least) about what the Lord said after the fall. As we were reading, it started to make more sense to me. Here's Moses 4:22-25

22 Unto the woman, I, the Lord God, said: I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception. In sorrow thou shalt bring forth children, and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
23 And unto Adam, I, the Lord God, said: Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the fruit of the tree of which I commanded thee, saying—Thou shalt not eat of it, acursed shall be the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life.
24 Thorns also, and thistles shall it bring forth to thee, and thou shalt eat the herb of the field.
25 By the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, until thou shalt return unto the ground—for thou shalt surely die—for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou wast, and unto dust shalt thou return.

Vs. 23-25 are all direct consequences of the fall, of the earth becoming imperfect (thorns and thistles coming) and also death is a direct consequence of the fall. These things don’t seem to be just punishments the Lord decided to hand out and things that He decided to do because they disobeyed him, but seem to be DIRECTLY the natural result of the earth and humans become imperfect and mortal. So, it would stand to reason that vs. 22 is the same. Because women’s bodies are now imperfect, having children will not be easy. Pregnancy is difficult. Giving birth is painful, it hurts, and it can cause death. Babies also die in the process . These are direct consequences of becoming mortal. It also stands to reason, then, that the last part of the verse—they desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee—is a direct consequence of the imperfection of people. Men are stronger than women, they are bigger, and also now imperfect so (and obviously women do this too, but because men are stronger it’s more so) they will now be trying to gain power over women and over each other. After the fall, women were oppressed. Men did rule and women have been oppressed (often brutally) throughout history. This is a result of the fall—that those who are carnal will try to rule over their wives and gain power generally over women. I don’t think this is a commandment—I don’t think it’s the Lord telling her to let Adam and other men rule over her, or telling Adam and other men to rule over women, I think it’s the Lord saying that now this is what’s generally going to happen because people are imperfect.

I know this sounds awfully pessimistic, but it's not to say this is always the case. This can happen with men or women, but like I said men have historically been stronger and have oppressed women. Those who are righteous, though--whether men or women, do not try to oppress others. ...Just a thought...

HAIR!

2009-08-03T14:38:00.001-07:00

New hair today! I love the girl who cut my hair (Erin at Taglio), she was so funny and after showing her the pictures I liked she came up with this and I love it! It's different than what I've had before, but still SHORT! I can make it fun and messy or more sleek. Hooray!

Camping

2009-08-02T10:48:00.000-07:00

OK I don't know what's up with my blog, but when I add pictures I can't see them until they're published--I only see code! So I can't comment between my pictures. Weird.

So this past week was Jardan's birthday! We went camping in Sedona with some awesome friends and their 2 kids--Eve and their son are SO funny together! They slept on one side of the camper in their own bed and they were having so much fun! They ate marshmallows and then watched the fire through the window and didn't go to sleep until about 2:00 (needless to say we ALL crashed in the car on the way home)!! It was so nice to hang out by the fire, eat smores, and be in a BEAUTIFUL place that has TREES! :) The next day we went to slide rock, which was so cold but really fun! They have natural water slides there, and it's in the most breathtaking place. I love Sedona! The last time we went was before Eve could even walk, so I put up a picture--I can't believe how much bigger she is!

Which haircut should I get?

2009-07-27T22:06:00.000-07:00

Which one should I get?

Power to the Peaceful 2009

2009-07-07T21:46:00.001-07:00

My goal: To go to this in San Francisco's Golden Gate Park this year.

Hallelujah! I am done!

2009-07-06T15:42:00.000-07:00

Finally finished my paper for my antislavery movements class!!! Here's my intro paragraph...continue at your own risk! :) I based it on the welfare system, since that's what I'm doing for my master's project. I'll put up my intro to that one later for some feedback!

Following the Civil War, both southern planters and the United States government strongly believed that the continuation of the plantation system was central to the economic well-being of the south and to the nation as a whole. In order to continue this system, a dependent, disciplined labor force was needed (Foner, 1988). Therefore, both the government and the white southern planters employed various strategies aimed to produce such a labor force, the majority of which was to be made up of freedmen and people of color. However, the goal of the freedmen was to live autonomous and self-sufficient lives, which was fundamentally opposed to the purpose of the government and southern planters. Because of this opposition, the debate concerning labor issues was central in the formation of Reconstruction policies. Resulting from this debate during Reconstruction were policies enacted with the intent to control labor. This original intent has been perpetuated in today’s welfare policies, and can be seen through various regulations which result in the funneling of welfare recipients into low-wage labor. As the link between Reconstruction and current welfare becomes apparent, the original justifications for the control of labor become clear, and the practices used during Reconstruction to control labor are seen to inappropriately continue on in our social welfare system. This control is harmful to recipients as it works against the elimination of poverty, and in many cases sustains it.

And some camping!

2009-06-26T23:24:00.000-07:00

We're gonna play in the sprinklers!
Yes, that's a toothbrush suctioned to her head--good for brushing daddy's teeth!
And some camping pictures from a few weeks ago! It was SO much fun, we'll be doing more as soon as Jardan gets back (he's got a roughly 4-week job in LA basically continuing what he was doing in the fall).
This is my favorite picture of them!
Eve was THRILLED to have marshmellows for breakfast!
And her beloved Bongo. He loves to look at the fire.
Sunset. I know this picture is dark but the scenery is amazing! I forgot we were in AZ! !!!

Jardan, jardan, the coolest man

2009-06-26T23:17:00.000-07:00

Dear Jardan,
In case you're getting homesick while working your job in CA, I put up this picture so you can count your many blessings (haha!). In more ways than one, you make me a better person (especially when you're in the same house as me)! :) I LOVE YOU!

Wedding!

2009-06-22T23:22:00.000-07:00

Why do my pictures always load the OPPOSITE way I download them? So...this weekend we went to Washington for Jardan's brother's wedding! Almost his ENTIRE family was there--except his older brother (although his older bro's kids were there). SO FUN!
Here's an extremely cheesy picture of us.
All of our nieces and nephews, Jardan's parents, and Jardan's grandparents (who drove all the way from Canada!).
Jardan's older sister and her son at the wedding. He caught the garter (well, prettymuch fought a kid for the garter) :)
Jardan, Adriel (sweet suit, huh??), and Le'Andra

Eve and Annie the Bride!
Eve and two of her darling cousins
Some of the groomsmen and the groom--what handsome men!
Eve and a few of her sweet cousins again

PPCM

2009-06-12T13:40:00.001-07:00

Anyone else been through this or know someone who has? I had our baby 2 years ago and was diagnosed with peripartum cardiomyopathy...looking for someone else to talk to about it because I don't know anyone who'se had it and I'm facing some important decisions. I feel weird posting this, but feel free to leave a comment.

Withdrawls...

2009-06-05T14:19:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure I'm addicted to sugar, so I'm trying to stop eating sugar-foods cold-turkey. After a month (how long it takes to break a habit), I plan to eat it sparingly, like some ice cream a few times a week. Seriously, though, this is SO HARD! I have these awful cravings and I'm just dying for SUGAR!! So I'm eating raw cashews (they're delicious), a LOT of apricots (for something sweet...I've eaten 2 today already), and drinking tons of water (Heather, if you're reading this!...). I'm sure it sounds like I'm exaggerating, but really this is hard!

I've got some pictures to post later from last weekend when Jardan, Eve, and I went camping. It was beautiful--just 2 hours away and there were forests of pine trees and birds and real dirt (not just sandy dust) and it smelled so good! It was amazing. But I have to get back to studying for now, I'm taking a great class on anti-slavery movements. It's pretty rigorous because it's only 5 weeks long, and we've got an impressive amount of reading to get done. The good thing is that it's really interesting! Thanks for listening!

Finally some pictures!

2009-05-24T14:55:00.000-07:00

Finally some pictures! We've been slackers about taking pictures, so these are pretty old. Above: Jardan's favorite Sunday activity :)
Eve and her sweet friend painting themselves
At my parent's ward's Easter egg hunt. Eve couldn't get enough of the candy!

We went to a zoo a while ago with Eve and Zane. Eve thought it was AMAZING that there was a baby deer on her shirt AND one that she could pet.
Eve says, "Big owies!" (She thought they'd be sharp)

Hooray!

2009-04-24T18:21:00.000-07:00

1. I got a scholarship for fall!! I'm pretty sure I was the only one who applied, but still, I'm SOOO glad!

2. My sister and my DARLING niece and nephew are coming to visit in a few weeks!

3. I have highly correlated results in the survey I conducted for my statistics final project! Meaning (surprise...) that people's views on abortion are highly related (at least in my non-random survey) to whether or not they follow a religion and whether or not they have strong spiritual beliefs. I still need to separate those who don't follow a religion but have strong spiritual beliefs--I think they won't be as highly correlated, i think it's mainly religion...but I'm really not sure...and I'm not quite sure how to separate the two. Anyway, THANK YOU to all of you who took my survey because you made it possible for me to complete my final project! :)

I'll put up some Easter pictures soon--it was probablly the best day of Eve's life because she ate SO MUCH candy (and refused to eat real food until dinner)!

Good times in Guilin

2009-04-08T21:16:00.000-07:00

This is in Guilin, China. For those of you who went--remember how beautiful it was??! I found this online today and set it as the desktop background on my computer so that I can look at it while I study and feel calmed as I remember the beauty of that place. It worked. When I feel overwhelmed, I look at it and I'm able to remember the bigger picture, and think about the most important things in life. If you haven't been, you should go.

ps. While there my two lovely now-married friends and I were on a hot-air balloon ride with an old Australian guy and the most INSANELY FUNNY English woman I've ever met who wore a matching shirt and shorts that were striped with every color of the rainbow. The whole time she was laughing while lavishly swearing and yelling "SHAY SHAY!" (supposed to be thank you in Chinese) in a thick English accent. Then we ran out of fuel and crashed. Into a rice patty. Narrowly missing a bamboo forest. And then once we'd made our way through the knee-deep mud and rice, a random van pulled up and we got in. They took us to a market and just dropped us off...so we bought some water to wash off the mud that was encrusted onto our legs, and then we hung out and eventually made our way home. On the way back I heard people talking about how a hot air balloon crashed earlier that day, and I was thrilled to realize that WE WERE FAMOUS!

When I'm gone

2009-04-01T09:48:00.000-07:00

One day while we were brushing our teeth, Jardan said, "Aubrey, you know what you'll miss most about me when I'm gone? All the weird noises I can make that you can't." Oh, how I love my husband (his comment was veiled teasing)! Sadly, it's true, sound effects are not my speciality. When I make gun noises, they come out something like, "Pew Pew!" Pathetic. I'm glad Eve has Jardan for a noise-making role model.

James Balog, extreme ice survey

2009-03-30T09:35:00.000-07:00

Survey

2009-03-28T00:03:00.000-07:00

Hey guys! For the final project in my statistics class, I had to create a short survey for people to take and then analyze the results. It's about abortion and religiosity/spirituality, and I need a BUNCH of people to take it...please help me! The link is https://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=_2bS8yqNcn52DQlIaBdubecg_3d_3d

Thanks so much :)

Light Rail

2009-03-19T00:18:00.000-07:00

I've started riding the light rail to/from school. Campus is about 40 minutes away (driving), but I can't park where I used to anymore. The light rail was finished and ready for use at the beginning of the year, but I just started riding about 2 weeks ago. I love it, even though it takes a bit longer. I'm in a qualitative analysis class right now, so one thing I'm learning is how to observe what's around me--become nosey. So now I look forward to my lightrail time, as it is always an adventure. I've seen middle-aged men fight, drunk teenage girls stumble and fall on top of each other, and listened to HILARIOUS elderly men tell dirty jokes. Normally on the light rail there's constant, loud background noise provided by the blasting AC. It's so loud that it muffles most conversations and, if you want, you can effectively ignore anything around you. Tonight at the Van Buren/Central stop the train paused longer than normal, and then the air went off. A conversation that had been going on quickly stopped, and silence ensued. What had been a sterile, impersonal space was suddenly a very small and intimate setting. I could smell the guy in front of me, and across from me heard the woman's clothes move as she uncomfortably shifted. We tried to continue ignoring each other, but we were all painfully aware of one another's presence. What makes us so unable to interact with other people who sit right next to us, whose shoulder has been pressed against mine for the last 30 minutes, but I can't even look at her? An excellent mix of hilarious, awkward, and so fascinating!

I'll be thinking about it more...comments?

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

2009-03-17T19:26:00.000-07:00

We took Eve to a free day at the children's museum. I love that this city has a lot of free community events!!

So Jardan and I are doing quite well! We're waiting to hear back from a PD that he did testing for, and meanwhile we've been really busy. He's been doing lots of research and looking at all sorts of jobs, trying to figure out the best path to take. I've been going to school, and even though I had spring break this past week I've been working more than usual because I have so much due! I just finished my last question on my stats midterm. Here's my answer (i know you don't want to read it, but I'm SO PROUD that I figured out how to enter the data into SPSS and also how to conduct the tests and interpret the results!!):

A one-way analysis of variance was conducted to examine the clinical efficacy of an antidepressant. The independent variable, the dosage of the antidepressant, had three levels: placebo, low-dose, and moderate-dose. The dependent variable was the patients’ scores for the Beck Depression Inventory, which was taken after four weeks of the assigned dosage of treatment with the antidepressant. The ANOVA was significant, F(2,12) = 11.27, p = .002. The strength of the relationship between the dosage treatment and the patient scores, as assessed by eta square, was strong, with the independent variable accounting for 65.3% of the variance of the dependent variable. Thus, results indicated a strong relationship between the dose of the antidepressant and the depression score.
Follow-up tests were conducted to evaluate the pairwise differences among the means. Because the variance among the groups ranged from 7.85-8.17 and Levene’s test of equality of error variances was significant, it was assumed that the variances were homogeneous. Post-hoc tests were conducted with Tuckey’s HSD. It was found that between the placebo (M = 38.2, SD = 8.17) and low-dose (M = 20.6, SD = 8.32) groups, as well as between the placebo and moderate-dose (M = 14.8, SD = 7.85) groups there were significant mean differences at the .05 level. However, between the low- and moderate-dose groups there was no significant effect. Thus, the results indicate that the antidepressant significantly reduced the depression scores of both the low-dose and moderate-dose groups.

I'm also doing research/trying to conduct a few in-depth interviews concerning how effective welfare is, hopefully getting at the fact that it needs to be improved, specifically by helping people go to SCHOOL and get REAL TRAINING for REAL JOBS--that is, if the goal of welfare is actually to help people get out of poverty (also trying to figure out if there's a difference between the "official" goal and "practiced" goal in AZ). I'm really excited and I LOVE what I'm studying. :)

Hope you all are having a beautiful March and are doing well!

Last Day

2009-02-20T12:26:00.001-08:00

Valentine's Day breakfast...well...President's Day I guess. Eve and I had the flu all morning, and on Monday Jardan woke me up at like 8 am--which was weird because I thought he was working! He surprised me and told me he wasn't working, and made me a pink V-day love-fest. :)

Pink crepes (crepes are our fave) and yogurt...SO good. Especially after not eating for 3 days!!

On another note, today is Jardan's Last Day of Work. Yes, the economy has caught up to us, too, and he's lost his job. He's been a consultant, and the company he works for makes money on a contract basis, and unfortunately everyone's suffering...so here we are jobless! Hopefully we'll be able to get out of our rental contract, and then we'll move in with my parents down the street. Jardan's applying to a few kinds of jobs--police departments are hiring in a few months, so he's turning in applications because they're starting the process soon (he's applying to all the cities around us that are hiring). He thinks the bootcamp would be fun (HE WOULD! Haha!). So we'll see how that turns out, he'd probablly do that until I'm done with school in another 1 1/2 years, then he's thinking about going to law school. I think he'd be fantastic! There are a lot of scholarships if you're going into non-profit or governmental work, which is what he wants, so we're hoping!! :) Wish us luck on this interesting transition!

On the Moral Purposes of Law and Government

2009-02-09T21:38:00.000-08:00

Libby and Mark posted this BYU forum address by Dr. Robert George, who is a doctor of theology and professor of jurisprudence at Princeton University. It's entitled, "On the Moral Purposes of Law and Government." It was given on 10/28/08, and enlightened me concerning many specific questions I have had when considering my stance on the issues of same-sex marriage and abortion. I've really been torn over these two topics for some time now, and have spent a very long time pondering these things...and this is such a wonderfully developed argument that I think you should listen if you have time! You can find it on the BYU Broadcasting website (www.byub.org) and from there click on "find a talk" on the left side, then in the options put his name. Or this may work...I'm very bad at tech stuff though... http://byubms.byu.edu/BYUForum/2008/10/BYUForum20081028-2345.mp4
It's pretty long, but Jardan and I just listened for our FHE. Lemme know what you think!

New Year!

2009-02-03T12:21:00.000-08:00

I know it's been a while since I've posted...busy new year! This is what I've been doing a lot this month--figuring out statistics! Agh! Good thing I have Jardan around :) Eve wanted to study with me before she went to bed. She's studying the children's Bible, I'm studying how to use SPSS.

First day of school. I can't believe January is so hot! Last year it was much colder, on avg. it's been about 12 degrees hotter this year...

Eve trying to be Harry Potter.

We went to the shooting range with Adriel, Annie, and Norel. Way fun and kinda scary.

Here's Annie and I being nervous.

I know I'm awesome. Don't mess with me.

Eve LOVES blueberries...

Hope you are all having a wonderful new year! :)

Christmas--out of order!

2008-12-29T20:20:00.000-08:00

We've had a VERY fun Christmas season! We got together with the Ferrin family pre-Christmas and opened presents. Then, the day after I finished finals (Wednesday) Eve and I flew to Spokane to hang with the Smiths. Jardan met us there on Friday, and we're all here for about another week. The first picture is Jardan (well, his butt) and Adriel (very scary) setting up the tree.

We've been snowed in almost the whole time we've been here because of the record snowfall! Here's Eve trying out grandpa's plow.

Annie (she and Adriel are getting married this summer) and I baked for an entire day, and here's the fantastic carrot cake we made...without Jardan's help, fortunately! Jean was cooking some delicious dinner, too!

My parents gave me the most beautiful leather laptop bag...this is actually the face I made because I was so overcome by its glory...

The best dad and the best Christmas shows!

Jardan got this drum from Mom and Dad and he hasn't parted with it since. Seriously.

Zane's reading "Make Way for Ducklings"...such a good uncle. She's missed him while we've been in Spokane!

Snowed in! Eve has four layers of clothes on, and it reminded me of "A Christmas Story." After dressing her, Jardan tried to sit her on the floor to put her shoes on, but she had so many clothes on that she just fell on her back because she couldn't bend enough to sit! She was stuck like an turtle on its back, and we couldn't help but laugh at her cries!

While in Spokane, Jardan's family watched Eve for a few days so we could get away (an early anniversary, which is actually on the 4th). The original plan was to go to Montana, but with all the snow we couldn't. We stayed downtown Spokane instead, and went out to eat, saw a movie (The Curious Case of Benjamen Button), and went ice skating. It was FANTASTIC weather and soo much fun to just be together ALONE because we've been apart for so long! Ice skating was hilarious, I love how everyone looks so dorky...except there were these 3 little girls in the middle who schooled everyone else--and they couldn't have been more than 10 years old!

We found a restaurant called Mizuna's that had an excellent atmosphere and phenomenal vegetarian food!

This one's for Austin...this sweater is SOOO CUTE! Christmas night she wouldn't let me take it off! She said, "Momma, just leave it." She's wanted to wear it every day since...I guess he knows her taste!

Our darling niece Jasmine opening a present. Norel (her dad) next to her, then Jean (Jardan's Mom), and Jarrel in the green.

She totally posed for this.

She threw her new princess barbies (from Jasmine) in this bag and carried them around all night. She went off to the computer room and played with them for about 1/2 an hour and wouldn't let ANYONE in the room.

Jasmine and Alex, her mom

Jardan and Eve pretending to play the Christmas ornaments that are mini-instruments. She thought this was SOO cool.

Hope all of you had an extraordinary Christmas! We love you guys!

One class down!

2008-12-11T15:56:00.000-08:00

I'm done with my first class of this semester! Just handed in the 20 page paper--it's a proposal, "Phoenix and Tempe Welfare Recipients and Postsecondary Educational Attainment." I have a crush on this paper; it's beautiful. Thanks to Jardan for getting 4 hours of sleep last night to help me revise this monster. It's a proposal you'd submit to the IRB and to foundations to get grants to study; here's part of my abstract:

"This study seeks to examine whether Arizona’s welfare policies and practices actively support the pursuance of postsecondary education among single mothers on welfare, the motives of such mothers in seeking higher education, and whether they feel supported by the local government. This research will bring to light the personal views and experiences of caseworkers and single mothers on welfare, situated within the larger framework of official policies and practices of Arizona."

Now I just have one more paper to write by Tuesday (should be interesting)...then off to the Jardan's parents' house for Christmas!! I'll post more pictures soon, like of Thanksgiving and a few other things...hope everyone has happy holidays!

Dress-up

2008-12-06T09:16:00.000-08:00

Later in November, Mom, Dad, Jardan, and I went to a black tie event! It was so fun! Mom had these fantastic red shoes, but I didn't get a picture of them, so I'll take another later. There's a lot more to post, but I'm supposed to be working on my final papers right now! I'll do more later :)

Catch-up

2008-12-06T09:07:00.000-08:00

My pictures downloaded in opposite order! There's so much to tell, though, so the bottom ones are from Eve's birthday: her first haircut, then opening presents, then trick or treating! She loved trick or treating, and for about a month after she asked EVERY DAY if we could go again! The next week we went to LA to visit Jardan, and we showed Eve the ocean again. She was very nervous and said, "Loud water scary! Cry!"

Haha

2008-10-27T21:19:00.001-07:00

Forgot to mention that Mom and Dad were Ohura and Spock from old-school Star Trek. Couldn't see that one coming... TREKKIES RULE!

Monkey, Star Trek, Grim Reaper!

2008-10-27T21:11:00.000-07:00

We went to Trunk or Treat at my parent's ward this weekend, it was so fun! Eve was a monkey and was, of course, OBSESSED with her tail. (Eve's got a monkey named Bongo and she sleeps with it every night, and tickels her face with its tail...so she LOVES monkeys!) We're going trick or treating this Friday, too, and I'll post some pictures for that. Jardan's coming home early so that we can all celebrate Eve's birthday on Halloween, too (although it's the 28th)...AND Eve's going to get her FIRST HAIR CUT on Friday! Hooray! She's such a shaggy little hooligan right now :)

Website

2008-10-17T15:40:00.001-07:00

If you haven't seen this yet, you guys should check out www.etsy.com It's fantastic! It's a place to buy and sell handmade things--like purses, clothes, art, jewelry, etc. They include ratings, too. Check it out!!

Beach

2008-10-14T14:02:00.000-07:00

We also drove down the PCH to Laguna Beach this weekend. The drive was great and it was SO WONDERFUL to see the ocean again! Eve loved playing in the sand, but was really afraid of the waves. Every time they'd come she'd yell "Oh NO!" and grab onto whoever was closest! It probablly didn't help that the water was freezing.

LA Trip!

2008-10-14T13:54:00.000-07:00

Jardan's work flew Eve and I out (last minute) to LA to visit!! It was so fun to be together so many days in a row--flew in Friday morning and got back today--Tuesday morning. These first few pictures are of the Getty museum, which was the most beautiful museum I've seen. The buildings and grounds were just amazing...and it was a green, LEED certified building (Jardan's working on getting his LEED certification, so he was excited about that)! Look up the Getty to see more pictures because it's amazing, it's up on a hill overlooking all of LA, and we got there at sunset, which was definately a sight.

"Preside"

2008-10-07T00:14:00.000-07:00

Here's a fantastic post from the Zelophehad's Daughters blog (I haven't been into the blog long enough to know WHY it's called that, but they're fantastic and also LDS). It's long, but if you get the chance, it's a thought provoking reflection on the "preside" issue.

Fathers are Just Irreplaceable; They Don’t Need to Preside to be Important
Posted by Kiskilili
One popular way of slashing through the Gordian knot that is the term “preside” in Mormon thought is to assert that it is merely ceremonial and thus utterly insignificant to the power dynamics of marriage. In this model, specifically in order to be consonant with a system of equal partnership, “presiding” by definition must entail the fulfillment of tasks of such a thoroughly trivial nature that they in no way impinge on the wife’s status as full equal–such as calling on someone to pray, or (presumably) showing up at Family Home Evening in a ceremonial miter–activities inconsequential enough that they no more risk disequilibrium than does the wife’s turning on the stove without reporting to her husband first. In this system, “presiding” in the home entails the following situation: (a) it must involve performing tasks that are fundamentally insignificant, lest the equal partnership balance be tipped; (b) by their nature, insignificant tasks tend to be simple activities (virtually anyone can perform them with minimal expenditure of effort: hence their insignificance); but (c) these tasks must nevertheless be assigned to the father exclusively, “by divine design.”

In other words, our twisted model of presiding that is sprouting up around equal partnership rhetoric suffers from its own internal tension: presiding must be insignificant at the same time it must be of eternal import. Its value, therefore, is not inherent to our model of appropriate family government (in contrast to the more traditional model of presiding, in which the father’s role is absolutely central), but is artificially assigned.

The oft stated rationale for this model is that fathers tend to float on the periphery of family interaction, drawn to other family members by the weakest of gravitational forces. Although they’re not an inherently necessary or even important element in family dynamics, something should nevertheless be done to at least keep them in orbit.

Purportedly this is a way of claiming that fatherhood is non-fungible. Unfortunately, our extension of trivial tasks the average two-year-old can carry out to fathers, far from making a statement about the essential, irreplaceable importance of fatherhood, is a tacit admission of exactly the opposite: fatherhood is entirely expendable. It’s a made-up calling, like ward bulliten board straightener: if no father is present to choose someone to pray, the situation will simply take care of itself. (I’ve witnessed this repeatedly with roommate prayers: rather than waiting for a stray father to wander into the room and preside, someone just volunteers.) The fact that we’re bent on making fatherhood matter is itself an indication that we think it really doesn’t.

(Of course, fathers have a more strenuous assignment–”providing”–that can be accomplished without any family interaction. But the focus of this post is fathers’ significance to personal family dynamics.)

Or maybe presiding is simply the lure. Maybe once fathers start calling on people to pray, they’ll become interested in those people’s lives, while if they weren’t given such a duty, they’d remain entirely oblivious and emotionally inaccessible. But if this is the ultimate desired outcome for which presiding is merely a hook, why not be explicit about it? Presiding doesn’t ineluctably lead to family involvement any more than asking the cashier at Dunkin’ Donuts for a receipt leads to lifelong friendship.

Thus our solution to the apparent incongruities between presiding and equal partnership only raises further problems whose implications are deeply troubling. The assumptions underlying this model strike me as entirely false and demeaning to fathers. Undoubtedly as a result of nature and nurture operating in tandem, men and women are different, and while there’s a lot of room for overlap, a male parent is just a flat-out irreplaceable asset to a family, regardless of how spectacular or flexible a parent the mother is. Fathers don’t need to be patted on the head and given hollow ritual duties; we don’t have to ask them to flip the light on in the morning and then sit patiently in the darkness of voluntary helplessness until they wake up. Fathers matter in ways far more profound than providing or our attenuated definition of ”presiding” indicate, and a father’s absence reverberates far beyond confusion over who should bless the food. Fathers matter not because they preside when present, but in spite of the fact that mothers can easily preside in their absence. In fact, fathers’ ideal duties might best be represented by the term “nurture.” But I don’t think we have to be afraid that gender confusion will result because this is the mother’s primary role. If we’re serious in our claims that men and women are naturally different, we have nothing to fear from the prospect of fathers and mothers nurturing together. Let’s acknowledge fathers’ natural centrality and importance to the family rather than concocting vacuous tasks to keep them minimally at the periphery.

Conclusion: If presiding means exercising authority, fathers are indispensable but mothers are infantilized. If presiding means carrying out trivial and inconsequential ritual functions at family meetings, fathers are entirely dispensable. How about just retiring an overworked term?

Good Book

2008-10-03T15:04:00.000-07:00

This book is called "Unwanted Sex: The Culture of Intimidation and the Failure of the Law" By Schulhofer. Here's the description: "Despite three decades of intense scrutiny and repeated attempts at ambitious reform, the laws regarding rape and sexual harassment still fail to protect women from sexual overreaching and abuse. This original, provocative, and enlightening work shows the need to refocus on laws against rape and to create a new system of legal safeguards against interference with sexual autonomy." I read quite a bit of it my last year at BYU and it's fantastic if any of you are interested!

WooHoo!

2008-09-30T23:16:00.000-07:00

In case you can't see it, this says "Excellent! (with TWO underlines!) Very well done. Best exam in class." YYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY! This is my first exam of graduate school, my first graded thing, and, although I should be more humble, I did awesome! It was an exam in my Theories class (on Plato's The Republic, Aristotle, and various other readings like Mencius, who's pretty cool)....I wrote 11 pages...in 2 hours...I really don't know how I'm even typing right now because my hand hurt so bad! I got a 99% --so now I can slack off the rest of the semester and still get a B! HAHA just kidding! Like I could actually be NOT-OCD and do that. :)

Yes I should be asleep!

2008-09-30T01:53:00.000-07:00

I finally finished homework (in a roundabout way), so here I am at 2 am eating a milkshake and relaxing. The first is a picture of the lovely Ferrin Ladies at Kardyn's blessing...she's so beautiful!! The second is of us swimming...haha we can still swim here! (ok I'm not totally jealous, it's been above a hundred and I miss wearing sweaters and long sleeves). The last is how many bobby pins it takes to set off an airport metal detector! Coming back from Julia's wedding I kept my hair up, and I had SO MANY bobby pins from the bridesmaid up-do that the metal detector went off, and they had to search my hair! Sweet.

I Can!

2008-09-22T18:27:00.000-07:00

I Think I Can

If you think you are beaten you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't;
If you want to win but think you can't,
It's almost a cinch you won't.

If you think you'll lose you're lost;
For out of the world we find
Success begins with a fellow's will;
It's all in a state of mind.

Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger and faster man,
But sooner or later the woman who wins
Is the woman who thinks she can.

Poem courtesy of my friend Aisha. It gives me courage! Well, I started graduate school at the end of August, and my program is great--I love my professors, classes, and classmates. It's wonderful to be back in school; I've missed it (yes, I'm proud to be a nerd). Jardan's living in LA for the semester, until the end of December. He's working to get a hospital switched from the old facility to the new. He enjoys the work--new set of skills and a lot more interaction with people (versus computers). It's hard being apart (we only see each other on Sundays), but I suppose we're learning a new set of communication skills! I'm also learning that everything is relative, and that finding joy is TOTALLY optional: it's always there if you look for it, but you can also just choose to ignore it. So, we're having fun trying to navigate this strange place we're in, but now that I think about it, I guess Jardan's always loved to be "lost" (he purposely gets lost--thinks it's an adventure, so metaphorically speaking he should love this!)!

New home, new school, new bathroom!

2008-08-11T16:11:00.000-07:00

Wow! A lot's been happening! We moved recently--across the street to a less-expensive apartment. It's nice and homey, a smaller community and great neighbors. Cockroaches are a drawback, but I've only seen 1 live one (cross my fingers!!), so I'll buck up and stop being a wuss. I'll put up some pics of the new apartment once it's in "working condition." I'm also getting ready to start school in a few weeks, and there's been an unbelievable amount of work to do! It's exciting, though, so I'm trying not to stress. Jardan and I also celebrated our birthdays! He's now a quarter of a century old and I'm only a year behind :) We had lots of fun: suprise breakfast, a trip to an observatory, lunch with Dad, driving mustangs, cake and cracker pudding (Jardan had cracker pudding because he's not a huge fan of cake--Thanks Mom!!). It's been a great few weeks! Also, our upstairs bathroom finished a few weeks ago, so I'm posting pictures because I think it's so pretty!!! !! ! Sad that we can't live in it after alllll the work we've done upstairs! Hopefully someone wonderful buys or rents it soon so they can enjoy it as much as we'd like to!

Our Utah House for sale!

2008-07-04T12:58:00.001-07:00

We still own a house in Provo, and we've been re-doing it. It'll be complete next Tuesday, and we're beyond excited!! We've cleaned up and planted in the front yard, painted, and re-done the bathrooms (among many other things). Here's a pic of the downstairs bathroom, which looks AMAZINGLY better than it used to. It has new fixtures, new sink, new paint, new flooring (linoleum), etc. The upstairs one is almost done, and it's gorgeous--newly tile floors & bathtub surround, glass block window, new fixtures, new paint. I'll post a picture next week! ...too bad we're doing all this AFTER moving out! Oh and if any of you know someone looking to buy in the Provo market, let us know--we just reduced the price to sell it faster! (it's a duplex)

My friend!

2008-07-03T23:18:00.000-07:00

I was browsing through my wedding pictures tonight and I found this picture of Sarah and I, and I miss her! So here's to Sarah, a beautiful friend--love you!!

Rock Climbing Adventures!

2008-06-26T15:47:00.000-07:00

Mom and Dad were WONDERFUL enough to watch Eve for us, so Jardan and I took off Friday afternoon and went camping/rock climbing! It was nice to see that AZ really can be beautiful! We had so much fun! Jardan definately has less inhibition than I do when it comes to HEIGHTS (compare him to me desperately clinging to the rock face).

Cute Eve and Ugly Spider

2008-06-04T06:33:00.000-07:00

This is Eve holding hands with her friend Aliyah at the zoo. They are so darling together!
Eve LOVES Mom and Dad's hose.

We found this huge, disgusting spider on Mom and Dad's house! Jardan caught and we put it in a jar--its legs were as wide as the jar! SICK.

Early Birthday Present for Aubrey

2008-06-03T21:04:00.000-07:00

Since we're not going to UT this weekend (as we had planned), Jardan and I decided to go ROCK CLIMBING/camping! We've gone climbing before, but always with borrowed gear, I didn't have any. So...we needed to buy me some gear. AMAZING. I love it! I got some shoes (Red Chilis, they're gorgeous), a harness, and a few misc. things necessary to rock climbing safety. A large purchase, but well worth it! We're both extremely excited to get back into the rock climbing game (I've been working out my forearms at the gym--can you tell how bulked up they are? I'm intimidating, I know).

Memorial Day!

2008-06-03T20:56:00.000-07:00

For Memorial Day we went with my family to Prescott! It was amazing--there was a FOREST and it smelled like pine and real nature, and it was nice and breezy. I couldn't get enough of it. We rented rowboats for about an hour, and Eve loved it, she was asleep within 15 minutes (she hasn't slept cuddled up to me since she was a newborn!). Of course Zane loved the lizards, and when he caught this one we were all shocked that it had such beautiful colors on its stomach! (And that it matched him perfectly.) It was just a normal brownish color on front; you'd never know. All in all a FANTASTIC Memorial Day! Hope yours was as stellar as ours :)

Little (Obnoxious) Bird

2008-04-04T13:31:00.000-07:00

We have a little bird that's taken up lodging in front of our door! It's actually kindof an ugly pidgeon, and it's fairly obnoxious with all the noise it makes, but it's hurt and I feel bad so I finally bought some seeds for it because I don't want it to die. Jardan makes fun of me--he calls them rats of the sky (I don't think they're nearly as horrible or creepy as rats!), but Eve LOVES having it around because it's not at all afraid of us (as you can see...it just lets us come close and take a look)!

Happy Easter!

2008-03-24T11:56:00.000-07:00

Well, once again our little Eve turned into a biological weapon and infected us all with a nasty stomach virus...so Easter weekend was spent in bed (as was last Thanksgiving). Bad luck with holidays!! She had a sweet Easter dress this year, but I'll have to take a picture of it today, instead. And now a side note: while talking to my parents yesterday, I figured out that most people have no clue what the justice studies program is about. Well, they just re-did their website, so if any of you want to see the coolest program ever go to sjsi.clas.asu.edu!

A thought I'd like to voice

2008-03-19T15:17:00.000-07:00

I know I don't usually "blog," but I've been thinking about this for several days, and I don't agree with this...and since I'm home alone, I'm voicing this HERE :) I've often heard the Relief Society referred to as an auxiliary organization within the Church. First, auxiliary has a few meanings: giving support; serving as an aid; helpful. Also, an organization allied with, but subsidiary to, a main body of restricted membership. Of course the Relief Society gives support and aid to others, but the priesthood organization gives support and aid to us, too. So, if we're only going by that definition, priesthood organizations would also be termed "auxiliary" (which they're not). So, it seems like people generally mean the second. It's been said time and again by prophets and apostles (who are specifically speaking about the role of women) that women are equal partners with their husbands, and in no way are they subordinate to them (subordinate basically=subsidiary). Also, Joseph Smith said "The Church was never fully organized until the women were thus organized." (Story of the Organization of the Relief Society, Relief Society Magazine, March 1919, p. 129) While I'm aware that the priesthood presides within the Church (which to me prettymuch means they receive revelation for the Church and its members, but I'm open to correction), that does not mean that they are "above" women or more important...from reading the apostles' and prophets' words, it seems to me that Relief Society is essential to the Church, and essential to the Church's ability to fulfill its mission. Also, men and women need one another for salvation, with neither being subordinate to the other (or of less importance than the other). I'm confident that R.S. is not simply a help to the priesthood or subordinate to the priesthood organization, and also that it's not just an added-on benefit of the church, but Relief Society is necessary to the Church. I know this might seem kindof silly to think about for so long, but I believe it's important to think about in order to understand women's responsibilities/roles as well as the responsibilities of men. People who term it as such may not even mean auxiliary in the way I think, but if we are to value one another as we should, we need to speak in a way that shows that. Since these issues can be confusing, especially for women, I thought I'd write my thought down: Relief Society is not an auxiliary organization. Thanks for listening, guys :)

Charming baby

2008-03-16T19:50:00.000-07:00

She's picking up on things faster now, and in the last few days has learned where her eyes, ears, mouth, nose, and teeth are! She also knows how to fake-cry when she doesn't get what she wants. Very charming :)
ps. we found out a couple weeks ago that I got into grad school! Justice Studies at ASU

Anja, Chase, and Austin visiting!

2008-02-26T20:17:00.000-08:00

President's Day Hike

2008-02-26T20:04:00.000-08:00

Dad, Mom, Zane, Jardan, Eve, and I went on a four hour hike on President's Day and took a picnic. It was SO green and absolutely beautiful! This is our stylish new hiking backpack--Sherpani is a great brand!

Eve wanted us to enjoy the flowers, too!

FAMILY!

2008-02-26T16:38:00.000-08:00

Austin and Chase on the train. We went near Sedona on a sweet train ride to celebrate people's birthdays!
Eve can't live with her monkey, Bongo.

Poppa makes weird faces at Eve

It's been a long time!

2008-01-17T20:59:00.000-08:00

I'll add some Christmas pictures soon (and Eve's birthday from October)! Sorry it's taken me SO LONG to do any. Jardan recently got hired on as a full employee (no more internship!), and he aced his simulation class he was taking during his internship! I just took the GRE to get into grad school, I'm applying to get my master's at the School of Justice and Social Inquiry at ASU...I just finished the application process so I'll have more time to add posts now!

2008-01-17T20:56:00.000-08:00

She was doing this all day--wrapping the clothes around her neck; She thought it was the best thing ever

2008-01-17T20:48:00.000-08:00

I forgot these cute San Francisco pictures!

2007-10-21T22:53:00.001-07:00

Eve with Alcatraz in the background

Jardan was trying to get her to jump, and she kept shaking her head! "NO WAY!" So funny.

San Francisco and Oregon

2007-10-21T22:42:00.001-07:00

This past weekend the Arizona clan met the Eisenbrants (Tim, Anja--my sister, and Chase) in San Fracisco. Our first stop was Alcatraz, where we went on an audio tour. I was subjected to several audio tours as a child (Amish country, Gettysburg), but this one was AWESOME, I highly recommend it. We spent time on fisherman's warf (amazing clam chowder), Ghiardelli Square (Jardan gave me his free sample of chocolate), and just exploring the city. Jardan and Dad went home on Monday, while Mom, Zane, Eve, and I went with the Eisenbrandts back to Oregon. It was beautiful! We always forget that it's not actually summer anymore.

2007-10-21T22:31:00.000-07:00

Dad and Zane on the ferry over to Alcatraz

2007-10-21T22:24:00.000-07:00

Jardan, Eve, and I went on an adventure across the city while everyone else went to an aquarium. Eve is a monkey and she had fun climbing the walls at this Chinatown park we stopped in.

This was at the Aquatic Park in San Francisco. COLD WATER, but Eve didn't mind because she enjoyed the sand and the splashing.
This is a funny face she makes when it's sunny outside.

2007-10-21T22:10:00.000-07:00

When we got to Oregon we went on a hike to see the salmon jumping upstream. SO BEAUTIFUL! Fall is my favorite time of year, it was wonderful to go!

Anja found a salamander on the way, and we carried it for like half an hour in my camera case till we could show it to Zane. It was WAY COOL--the top was brown and the bottom was orange. Zane didn't want to give it up, and it took him 20 min to say goodbye.
Eve carried this leaf for a LONG TIME, despite her frozen fingers. She loved it.

Fall is here. It's 95 degrees.

2007-10-08T22:54:00.001-07:00

We found this sweet outfit at Mom's house. She looks like a senile old woman!

Her favorite place to be--the fridge.
Eve in her toboggon.
We went on a trip a few weekends ago with Mom, Dad, and Zane. We visited Kartchner Caverns--very beautiful, but we couldn't bring cameras. The next day we went to the missile silo, which everyone loved, esp. Zane!

Slide Rock and More

2007-09-17T22:54:00.000-07:00

Eve in our dryer. Jardan likes to see what strange things she can fit in.
We went with some of our friends and Zane to this place called Slide Rock in Sedona over Labor Day--it was SO FUN! It's a big river, a lot of it is fairly shallow, and there are these natural slides all over. It's covered in mossy stuff so it's really slippery, and if you lay down flat you just slide right down! It was AWESOME (and cold)!

My friend Afton and I took our babies to the mall where they have one of those cool fountains that kids can play in. Eve was scared at first, but after a couple minutes had a lot of fun!

2007-08-29T17:21:00.000-07:00

Darling Eve!
Her two teeth!!

2007-08-29T17:15:00.000-07:00

How Eve feels about peas
At Norel and Alex's wedding. We went last weekend for a short trip so we could be there--Jardan was in the wedding.

Lately

2007-08-29T17:03:00.000-07:00

Erin Seage--SO fabulous! I love my cousin!
Yes, I'm a graduate!!! I have a degree in Sociology from BYU. Eve is happy her momma is a graduate, too, because she doesn't have to spend her days on-campus.

We all took a road trip up to Provo!

2007-07-19T15:53:00.000-07:00

On our way back from Canada we saw these--they were only about 10 feet away!
This is Eve's cousin Jasmine feeding her. Jasmine's the newest niece in the family, because Norrel (Jardan's brother) just married Alex, and on the 6th of July the papers went through for him to officially adopt Jasmine. She's 3 years old and SO smart!!
Le'Andra, Jardan's sister, Jasmine, and Eve
Zane is rubbing off on Eve :)
The day Dad got back into town, Jardan shaved his hair to look like Dad's--the horseshoe! It's hard to see (the picture was taken at night) but SO FUNNY! He walked around all the next day and got some funny looks.

2007-07-19T15:41:00.000-07:00

While we loaded the U-Haul she slept in the laundry basket
She looked out the plane's window for like 10 minutes!
Grandpa and Grandma Smith
Kissing cousins! This was at Jardan's family reunion in Canada. The little girl's name is Leah (Jardan's cousin's daughter), and the two of them kept kissing!!
These are some of Jardan's cousins who are my age!

Wakeskating

2007-06-24T19:19:00.000-07:00

We went wakeskating with our friends at a nearby canal...it's like wakeboarding but without the bindings. HOT DAY

Packing with Eve

2007-06-24T19:16:00.000-07:00

She climbed up there!! ;)

She loves our garbage

Summer 2006 Trip

2007-06-08T16:44:00.000-07:00

Jardan and I in the hot, hot sun!

2007-06-08T16:43:00.000-07:00

The girls rubbed my belly for good luck! :)

2007-06-08T16:42:00.000-07:00

Posing before riding some sweet rapids

2007-06-08T16:41:00.002-07:00

Jardan's jumping off big, scary driftwood!! I'm concerned...

2007-06-08T16:41:00.001-07:00

Jardan doing a headstand on his kayak

Atlanta Trip

2007-06-05T13:31:00.000-07:00

She looks angry but she was just excited because she loves the water :)

2007-06-05T13:27:00.000-07:00

We visited Atlanta's aquarium, it's supposed to bethe biggest in the US, although I think Chicago's is bigger! This is Eve and I with a HUGE whale shark--20 feet long!

2007-06-05T13:20:00.000-07:00

While we were in Atlanta we hiked to this beautiful waterfall, it had about 700 stairs! We were so hot and sweaty, but the view was worth it!